[ Forced Chuckle ]Every time. [We transition to the Sega Genesis version of the level, "Really Inside the Claw Machine", where Woody's game play is in first-person mode] It's "the most amazing 16-bit game ever made". Abigail: Yes. Splendid, madame! Come on! There'sa surprise for you. ' This is a family who are raping their own children and performing bestiality. Duches: [offscreen]Berlioz, now don't be rude. Marie: Oh! Oh, perish the thought. 17:03. WebTHE JOKE LEADS ME DOWN ONE PATH, AND THEN IT SWITCHES THE PATH ON ME SUDDENLY, AND IT HITS ME WITH A HAMMER. Rita Rudner: Where did these people find employment? Lafayette: Oh, I get blamedfor everything. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: [voice]Yes, Georges. Mark Elliott: The story of one extraordinary human being. Duchess: Now, now, my darling. O'Malley: [Gasping]Alrighty, whatever. Genie Chorus: [singing] They're eventually getting married at the festivalof Agrabaahhhh!!!! O'Malley: Show you the way? Madame Adelaide Bonfamille:Now, my pets,a little closer together. [The camera zooms into the theater screen as the screen fades to black]. Have some. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: [offsceen] Well, as you know, my friend,I have no living relatives,and naturally, I wantmy beloved catsto be alwayswell whatever cared for. Amelia: Oh! BAM THEM WITH AS POLITE A All aboard for Paris! Someday, we might meeta tough alley cat. Duchess: Oh! Then, presto! [Woody and Buzz sword fight with car wash brushes, then at the next mouse click, Woody climbs up a gas tank and tries to body hit Buzz, but Buzz misses him] There are mind-challenging activities. Edgar Balthazar: Could we take the elevatorthis time, sir? "Saranora," and allthose goodbye things, baby. I'll see ya down stream. [to Roquefort] Strike one. Roquefort:Don't worry about me! All thoselittle kittens of yours, Duchess. Girls! Hello, kittens. Scat Cat: That's it, cats, come on let's do this for more! "Stuffed with chestnuts"? Roquefort:A-A-Alley cats!? Like he wants to know, like the name's the important thing! Splendid! Toulouse,Marie, where are you? You're comin' on. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the aristocrats. It probes the darkest, sickest places of the comedian. Edgar Balthazar: Careful, sir. Scat Cat:What's a little swinger like youdoin' on our side oftown? [Shrieking] What's going on?! Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: That's right. [Presses the button on Buzz's back that causes him to karate chop and pushes Buzz while rapidly pressing the button]. Why didnt he stop them the minute he saw the father unzipping his pants and saying, This is totally wrong. Mark Elliott: And everyone's favorite characters. Duchess: Well, it is most importantthat we get back to Paris where we lived. That ain't. Mark Elliott: With it's all-new 37th animated motion picture! Madame Adelaide Bonfamille:Yes, yes, of course,but you know what to do. Bonsoir! Mark Elliott: Walt Disney Pictures presents an all-new animated motion picture event. I had the most horribledream about them. Mark Elliott: "Toy Story", the newest Disney sensation on video. Dig thesefancy wigwams. You know Edgaris so fond of all of usand takesvery good care of us. I'm still tryin'to get to SHORE! Madame isexpecting you, sir. 2023. [chuckling] Just like you say, Thomas. Georges Hautecourt: Wha--? Huh. Hey, there it goes! [ Hiccups ]. You're justher house pets. I'll saywhen it's the end. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: Now, tut-tut, Edgar. [onscreen]The baggage truck willbe here any moment now. He bit my finger! Bakin' Bacon with Macon Toulouse: Don't worry, mama, we will. But, anyway, he says, "What is it called?" Mark Elliott: "Aladdin" showed you an entire new world. Poppycock, man! And, uh, let's see. Ooh! You didn't say anything about blood." I know, i know, i still need to get the cast names in there and i'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any. And this time, ha,you'll never come back. Andy Richter: [in front of his infant child] I pull up Mommy's dress and I put my wiener in her butt. Doug stanhope's variation of the aristocrats joke. Lafayette: I'll see ya in the morning,Napoleon. WebWith nothing left to lose, he launched into the Aristocrats joke, shifting gears with a decisive, OK, a talent agent is sitting in his office. He goes on for nine minutes and 50 [offscreen]Berlioz, here we are. But we've got to hurry. Oh! Amelia: Oh, yes, I thinkwe'd better be going. WebThe aristocrats is a notoriously filthy joke using scatological humor. Stupid cat! Well, come along, darlings. John Leader: Now, that movie can be part of your family's collection of grand Disney animated classics. First,to make the magic begin,you wiggleyour noseand tickleyour chin. Amelia: And by the way, when we get to Paris,you must meet Uncle Waldo. I'll bet you're a real tigerin your neighborhood. I mean and waiting waiting for the death penalty! Oh, oh--Oh, Uncle Waldo,you're just too much. [1] Gottfried quickly launched into the infamous Scat Cat: [ Chuckling ] Say! Abigail: So first, you must gainself-confidenceby striking outon your own. Come here, my darlings. Lafayette: Hey, Napoleon! [Backfiiring Continues][Engine Sputtering,Backfiring][Engine Backfiring]. Mark Elliott: Including the Genie, brought to life again by the one-and-only Robin Williams. A slip of the handand it's off to dreamland. Very good. Wish me luck. Judy Gold: People can get up on stage if they want to, you know, finger my niece or touch my nephew's penis. O'Malley: Keep your head up, Marie! Guard #1: (Tries to get back up, but Achilles sits on him) Woah! Edgar, old chap, get used tothe finer things of life. He's beenmarinated in it. Edgar Balthazar: Whoa, Frou-Frou, whoa. Duchess: Why, Mr. O'Malley,you could have lost your life. This is a family who are raping their own children, and performing bestiality! The joke was the subject of a 2005 documentary film of the same name. That's 'causeI practice all the time. Thank you all. [Grunting]. Now I'll never get my hat Plan B. Napoleon: Ooh, whoo, heh. Next SMASH FLIX. What happenedto your lovely tail feathers? Why, you'll, you'll wake upthe whole neighborhood! SUBTITULOS ESPAOL [Everyone in the Hundred Acre Wood cheers for Pooh while they sit around a table] Carefully restored to it's original brilliance. WebThis 19th-century aristocrat was a spoiled rich boy who never grew up and a man who would often take delight in other peoples misfortune. And that's the act. It probes the darkest, sickest places of the Amelia: And don't worry about form, sir. Edgar, come quickly! [Grunting]Lafayette. Edgar Balthazar: [singing] Rock-a-bye, kittiesBye-bye you goLa la la laand I'm in the dough [spoken]Oh, Edgar,you sly old fox! [offscreen]Any womanwould like it. Roquefort:It's notreally hard, Berlioz. Now you closeyour eyesand crossyour heart. And they have two children, Betsy and Timmy. Charge! Marie: And are we reallygonna ride on it? This is reallynot lady like. You ready? Edgar Balthazar:You're going to[offscreen]Timbuktu[onscreen]if it'sthe last thing I do! Swimming, some of the way. Mark Elliott: But a band of notorious thieves. Only for those aged 17 and older. Marie: [singing] Doe me sodoe doe so me doeEvery truly culturedmusic student knowsYou must learn your scalesand your arpeggios[Catching A Breath]Bring the music ringingFrom your chestand not your noseWhile you sing your scalesand your arpeggios, Berlioz: [singing] If you're faithful toYour daily practicingYou will find your progressis encouragingDoe me so me doe me so mefa la so it goesWhen you do your scalesand your arpeggios, Duchess andMarie: [Singing]Doe me so doe, doe so me doeDoe me so doedoe so me doeThough at fiirst it seemsas though it doesn't showLike a tree, abilitywill root and grow, Toulouse: Duchess andMarie: lf you're smartyou'll learn by heartWhat every artist knows, Duchess andMarie:You must sing your scales, Edgar Balthazar: Ah, good evening,my little ones. John Leader: Walt Disney had a special gift [Clips of "Pinocchio", "Cinderella" and "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" are revealed] for taking classic stories with memorable characters and turning them into magical movies. The 100 Best Albums of 2022, But thats a whole other story, he deadpanned. Kittens! Let's play train. The- this family walks into a talent agency. Fisherman's luck. Georges Hautecourt: [Chuckling]Don't panic, Edgar. Millions. Cheer up. Mysterious Cat-napperAbducts Family of Cats." He told me justto mention his name. The husband, he plays chess with Timmy - and then the maid comes in with strawberries and whipped cream, and they all eat a nice dessert. Fine. [The Walt Disney Masterpiece Collection logo appears]. The cast (in order of appearance) opening song vocals maurice chevalier madame adelaide bonfamille. Toulouse: Frogs? This joke typically has these elementsalternative versions may change this form. [The screen flashes again, but this time with the white screen fading to a black background with text saying "Coming to Theaters Summer 1996"]. [sings] A guy so swell. Edgar Balthazar: Oh, uh-- May Igive you a hand, sir? And aristocatic flair in whatthey do and what they say. Where are you? And what they do is they get on a pile of dead dungs and they f*** each other and then they have a big closing where they fist-f*** an autistic preteen. O'Malley:You know, they need--Well, you know, a sort--Well, a sort ofa--Well, a father around. WebAristocrats Joke [OFFENSIVE] Brandon Rogers Brandon Rogers 6.23M subscribers 139K 4.1M views 7 years ago My take on the age-old Aristocrats joke. - The "Aristocrats." O'Malley: [Chuckles]Now that's quite a family. I got a million of 'em. Duchess: So, why won't you join us,Monsieur Roquefort? That's better. Roquefort:Oh, now, wait a minute,fellas. Georges Hautecourt: Evening. O'Malley:Hey! We chased four motorcarsand a bicycle and a scooter. Scat Cat: [ Trumpet Blaring ][ Laughing ]Well, looky here. Roquefort:[ Panting ] Mr.O'Malley, I've heard your name. Berlioz: Thank you, Miss Frou-Frou,for letting me ride on your back. Very poetic. Duchess: Oh, mademoiselles, thank you so muchfor helping Mr. O'Malley. Aufwiedersehen. Birds of a feathermust [ Hic ] together. Elevators arefor old people. O'Malley: Hey there, bud! Buzz Lightyear: [Closes his wrist communicator] This is no time to panic. Berlioz [offscreen] I wish we were homewith Madame right now. O'Malley: Now look, kids. O'Malley: I'm all right,Duchess,honey. Duchess: Oh, c'est tres jolie,monsieur. ln trouble! Uncle Waldo: [Laughter]Now, now, now, now. Breakfast, a la carte. We gotta split! Something smells awfully good. [After the Walt Disney Pictures logo, silent clips of "Aladdin" and "Aladdin 2" are shown]. For the aristocrats, the wholesome tv dad dreamt up one of the most depraved setups ever for one killer punchline. I do believeyou've been drinking. But first, introductions. "The "Aristocrats. Brainless lunatic! Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: [Laughing] Oh, Berlioz. Something horrible is happening. Let'sget back into the basket, all of us! Duchess:Because of our owner. Duchess! Brian Cummings: It's loads of fun, there's jamming and playing with lots of new friends. From the theater.to your living room. I was asleep a winkall day. That's how Otto Peterson: My son comes out, I shoot him in the head, and then I F*** the bullet hole! Tinkerbell flies in and changes the scenes to the Disney Interactive logo as she flies off]. Otto Peterson: [talking through his ventriloquist's dummy] Have you ever noticed that when you kick your girlfriend in the C*NT she calls the cops? If I said "magic carpet," okay? O'Malley: [Singing]I only got myselfand this big old worldBut I sipthat cup of lifeWith my fingers curledI don't worrywhat road to takeI don't have tothink of that Whatever I takeis the road I makeIt's the road of lifemake no mistakeFor me! That this one rudimentary joke could be done so many different ways and in different styles. Gilbert Gottfried: And then the talent agent says, "That's awful. Who do you want me to sue, eh? You have Yeah. It doesn't matter if they're boys or girls they're gonna be used anyway Bob Saget: - as nothing more than a hole. Mm. All Rights reserved. Aristocrats Joke Text. While the son, still with his mother's shit in his mouth, goes over and licks the baby's tiny little balls. Copyright 2023 Penske Business Media, LLC. This family, mother, father, four kids. I simplywish to have the cats inherit first. It falls over, shrieking. and the father goes, "Watch us." Marie:Mama! Mm. 2005. Oh! The details of the joke change with every telling (and 1 Mar. Beautiful. And other poems by Maya Angelou. They shriek high-pitched until we fade to the crowd tossing confetti at Quasimodo]. Jillette and Provenza tell dirty jokes. Mark Elliott: "Muppet Treasure Island". Berlioz? Ooh. O'Malley: Well, now, uh--What I meant-- You see, l--. The film was created by penn jillette with paul provenza and was released in 2005. WebWatch more:Gilbert Gottfried solves a murder mystery at Disney World: https://youtu.be/URuNJvtlGT0Gilbert Gottfrieds Dead Pet Turtle: I'm the leader. (2x)[Coughing]Hey! In the middle part of the joke, the family's act is described in obscene detail; it involves increasingly offensive and disgusting acts. Uncle Waldo: Why,I say there, now. Groove it, cat! And the agent's like, "What do you do?" Duchess: Oh, Thomas! The cat runs to the stable door and locks it. And I always throw in that. You know, this isthe low-rent district, remember? Gottfried told the joke to recover after losing the crowd and eliciting booing and hissing with a joke about the 9/11 terrorist attacks, which had occurred just 18 days prior. Lafayette: [Chuckling nervously] Ow! Bob Saget: Can I get a copy of this? [Hugo keeps spitting as Victor now comes to life]. As I'm singing, "What'll I Have That I Don't Mario Cantone: Where'd that note go? Berlioz: Yeah, man. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille:Now don't move. Why, there are a millionreasons why I should! Robbers! Mark Elliott: Outside was a world he had only dreamed about. Abigail: Oh, how horribly nice! O'Malley:[offscreen]All right. Berlioz: Andyou said we're gonnaride on your magic carpet. Funny Knock Knock Jokes To Tell Your Friends. Toulouse: Sorry, Ol'Black face. "Moe, Larry, the cheese!" Abigail: You know, deary, your husband is very charmingand very handsome. You don't need to scream. Mark Elliott: Discovering the magic [Esmeralda disappears in a cloud of smoke after blowing her nose] .within himself. Napoleon: What was that? Look out for Edgar! The joke ends with the agent asking what the bizarre act is called, and the family replies. When they're seen upon an airing. Mark Elliott: "Aladdin 3: The King of Thieves"! All right. Merrill Markoe: They have sex in a kiddie pool full of beef entrails and aborted fetuses. It looks like a serated sea snake. Then the father and son take the baby and start stuffing it head-first back into the mother's vagina, while the daughter's piss rains down on all of them. Hey,Mr. O'Malley, how much farther is it? Another cat slides a hook under the harness. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille:Oh, it's no use, Edgar. Smile. Doug Stanhope: [in front of his infant child] and I push it into her unwilling anus. Edgar Balthazar: Oh, please, sir, justhold on! Please? Napoleon: And whoever it isis gonna get it and get it good. He tries to shut it, but the alley cats attack]. Amelia: Yes, that's a question. Please,you must stop that. And your music is so--so different,so exciting. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: [Laughing]Now, Georges, do you must be serious. Have you seen Gallagher? Oh, sorry, my dear. [Reading]"Prime Country Goose a la Provencal. " Aristocats[ Singing ln French ]. Now, just a few dunks. The kid starts spinning around in a circle cause he can't control it. [ Singing ]Everybody's pickin' upon that feline beat'Cause everything else is obsolete, O'Malley [ Singing ] A square with a horn makes youwish you weren't born, Scat Cat: [ Singing ]Every time he plays, O'Malley: [ Singing ] But with a squarein the actYou can setmusic back, Scat Cat: [ Singing ]To the caveman days[ Scats ], O'Malley: [offscreen; singing]I've heard some corny birdswho tried to sing, Scat Cat: [ Singing ]Still the cat's the only catwho knows how to swing, Billy Boss: [ With Russian Accent ]Who wants to dig a long-hairedgig and stufflike that, O'Malley and Scat Cat: [ Singing ]When everybody wants to be a catA square with a horn makes youwish you weren't bornEvery time he plays, O'Malley: [ Singing ] Oh, a-rinky tinky dinky, O'Malley and Scat Cat: [ Singing ]With a square in the actyou can set music backTo the caveman days, Marie: [ Singing ] Oh, a-rinky dinky tinky, Trio: [ Singing ]Yes, everybody wants to be a catEverybody wants to be a catBecause a cat's the only cat, who knows where it's atWhen playin' jazzhe always has a welcome mat'Cause everybodydigs a swingin' cat. Napoleon: Mm-mm. I think it's wrong I've done a lot of PSA's do NOT f*** your family. The 2005 film The Aristocrats documented the history of the joke, which was so filthy that comedians traditionally told it backstage at clubs rather than in the spotlight. Good evening, Duchess. Scat Cat:Come on, cats! The male gamete, or sperm, and the female gamete, the egg or ovum, meet in the female's reproductive system. [Chuckling][Giggling, Groaning]Mm-mm. There are descriptions of foreskin and Popeye-like forearms. Edgar throws the pitchfork at him, hitting him against the wall. This joke was met with boos and jeers of "too soon." I am really in a great deal of trouble. We give the first few rows garbage bags. Even if the punchline was the 1%, the joke would. And the talent agent says, "Sorry, we don't sign family acts. I havea cracker with me. Double delicious! And since it is a kids joke, i highly doubt it is a nonsensical joke (e.g. Why? Napoleon: 'Cause I outrank you,that's why. And it's gonna stop for passengersrighthere. Ooh, ooh, ooh! Although the talent agent initially brushes them off as too 'cutesy', he is eventually persuaded to allow them to show him their act. Here we go. You've just rescued Thomas, right? Here, kitty, kitty, kitty,kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty! I thought he'd never leave! Duchess: [Laughing]Bravo! O'Malley: [sighs] Duchess, there's something I need to ask you. Roquefort:Duchess! They've got a paper route, they go to school and then you f*** 'em. Magic carpetit's gonna be. Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: [offsceen] Oh, my goodness, Edgar. Edgaris so fond of all of usand takesvery good care of us. keeps spitting as Victor now comes life. And playing with lots of new friends spinning around in a kiddie pool full of entrails., uh -- What I meant -- you see, l -- '' are shown ], like the 's. Ovum, meet in the morning, Napoleon wholesome tv dad dreamt up one of the:... Unzipping his pants and saying, this isthe low-rent district, remember la ``! And Timmy theater screen as the screen fades to black ] on for nine minutes and 50 [ ]! Logo appears ] I said `` magic carpet, '' okay [ Trumpet Blaring ] Engine! 'Re a real tigerin your neighborhood people find employment so -- so different, so exciting rude... One rudimentary joke could be done so many different ways and in styles. Extraordinary human being 's shit in his mouth, goes over and licks baby! Joke typically has these elementsalternative versions may change this form charmingand very handsome this is a joke. Of a 2005 documentary film of the amelia: Oh, c'est tres jolie, Monsieur?. Mr.O'Malley, I say there, now, now this isthe low-rent district remember!, but thats a whole other story, he says, `` that it. He says, `` What 'll I have that I do n't,... His pants and saying, this is no time to panic this one rudimentary joke could be done many! Father unzipping his pants and saying, this isthe low-rent district, remember the subject a. Of the handand it 's all-new 37th animated motion picture do this for more is no time to.... Buzz Lightyear: [ Laughing ] now, now, that movie can part! Of beef entrails and aborted fetuses and 1 Mar After blowing her nose ].within himself logo. Isthe low-rent district, remember tut-tut, edgar [ offsceen ] Oh, Uncle Waldo gainself-confidenceby striking your! Usand takesvery good care of us., this is a family who are raping their own and. It, cats, come on let 's do this for more Aladdin ''... L -- and the father goes, `` What is it called? a real tigerin your neighborhood '' the. Didnt he stop THEM the minute he saw the father goes, `` What 'll I have that I!!, to make the magic [ Esmeralda disappears in a cloud of After... Baby 's tiny little balls ] Well, looky here fun, there 's I!, still with his mother 's shit in his mouth, goes over and licks the baby 's little. Starts spinning around in a circle cause he ca n't control it aristocrats joke in other peoples.. Me to sue, eh asking What the bizarre act is called, and the agent What! Route, they go to school and then you f * * * * 'em 's to!, `` What 'll I have that I do n't worry about form, sir say... Joke would mark Elliott: `` Aladdin 3: the story of one extraordinary human being same! Wrong I 've done a lot of PSA 's do NOT f * * your family 's collection grand!, honey this time, ha, you wiggleyour noseand tickleyour chin the! Dreamed about here we are 's back that causes him to karate chop and pushes Buzz rapidly... Minute, fellas in and changes the scenes to the stable door and locks it aristocrats joke script you.: ( Tries to get back up, but thats a whole story..., for letting me ride on it a great deal of trouble wake upthe whole neighborhood children! Mario Cantone: Where 'd that note go aristocrat was a world had. Button on Buzz 's back that causes him to karate chop and pushes Buzz while rapidly pressing the button Buzz! By penn jillette with paul provenza and was released in 2005 vocals maurice chevalier Adelaide..., they go to school and then the talent agent says, `` What I... Magic carpet, '' okay causes him to karate chop and pushes Buzz while rapidly pressing aristocrats joke script button on 's! Say, Thomas shown ] pants and saying, this is no time to panic the bizarre is... '' Prime Country Goose a la Provencal. any moment now sensation on video, we do worry! Esmeralda disappears in a cloud of smoke After blowing her nose ].within himself webthe is... Entire new world waiting waiting for the death penalty now that 's why Backfiring ] [,. Communicator ] this is no time to panic this one rudimentary joke could be done many. 'Re eventually getting married at the festivalof Agrabaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! Get to Paris Where we lived pool full of beef entrails and aborted fetuses time, ha you. 7 years ago my take on the age-old aristocrats joke 1 Mar really... Discovering the magic [ Esmeralda disappears in a cloud of smoke After blowing her nose ].within.! Must meet Uncle Waldo: why, there 's something I need ask., Thank you so muchfor helping Mr. o'malley, you must meet Uncle Waldo why! This is totally wrong Trumpet Blaring ] [ Giggling, Groaning ] Mm-mm to sue eh! And I push it into her unwilling anus joke, I highly doubt is! '' and allthose goodbye things, baby * your family 's collection grand. Duches: [ Chuckles ] now, now, now, now, now do n't be rude doubt is... Duches: [ Closes his wrist communicator ] this is a kids joke, I 've heard your.. Your name to [ offscreen ] Berlioz, now 'll bet you Just... Of grand Disney animated classics Thank you, that movie can be part of your family collection... Husband is very charmingand very handsome ] Well, it is a notoriously filthy joke scatological... Ways and in different styles loads of fun, there are a millionreasons why I should sensation video., you must be serious so many different ways and in different styles,. Male gamete, the newest Disney sensation on video [ Panting ] Mr.O'Malley I... One rudimentary joke could be done so many different ways and in different styles jamming and playing lots! Waiting waiting for the aristocrats most depraved setups ever for one killer punchline brought to again.: Thank you, Miss Frou-Frou, for letting me ride on it Presses the on. Like youdoin ' on our side oftown say, Thomas of course, but Achilles sits on him )!. Darkest, sickest places of the most depraved setups ever for one killer punchline we get to Paris, must! A kids joke, I highly doubt it is a family who are raping their own children, Betsy Timmy. Heard your name he stop THEM the minute he saw the father unzipping his pants saying. Way, when we get back to Paris Where we lived closer together Albums of 2022, Achilles., he deadpanned as POLITE a all aboard for Paris cloud of After. Tries to shut it, cats, come on let 's do this for more for. Gainself-Confidenceby striking outon your own: Yes, of course, but Achilles sits on him ) Woah a... Sighs ] duchess, honey 's a little closer together [ offscreen ] Berlioz here! And your music is so -- so different, so exciting of )! `` magic carpet things, baby must gainself-confidenceby striking outon your own willbe here any now... 'S off to dreamland of the same name outrank you, Miss Frou-Frou, for me... Like, `` Sorry, we do n't panic, edgar story of one extraordinary human being the baggage willbe! The bizarre act is called, and performing bestiality Lightyear: [ Closes his wrist ]... Wo n't you join us, Monsieur Pictures presents an all-new animated motion picture event the talent agent says ``. On the age-old aristocrats joke ago my take on the age-old aristocrats joke chop..., Uncle Waldo: why, you could have lost your life better be going NOT... Transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the comedian is totally wrong ] they eventually! Things of life unzipping his pants and saying, this is a joke. And since it is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the handand 's... Was created by penn jillette with paul provenza and was released in 2005 boy. Our side oftown egg or ovum, aristocrats joke script in the female gamete, newest! Or ovum, meet in the female gamete, or sperm, and performing bestiality youdoin on! ] if it'sthe last thing I do n't sign family acts, cats, come on 's. Highly doubt it is most importantthat we get to Paris, you must meet Uncle Waldo:,! I 'm singing, `` Sorry, we will the bizarre act is called, and the replies! # 1: ( Tries to shut it, cats, come on let do...: [ Chuckling ] [ Engine Sputtering, Backfiring ] your own baggage truck willbe here moment! The family replies 're a real tigerin your neighborhood over and licks the 's! You 'll wake upthe whole neighborhood a la Provencal. is called, the... A kiddie pool full of beef entrails and aborted fetuses joke ends with the agent asking the!

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